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Transcript

America, Blink Twice If You Need Help

I need America to look in the mirror and ask itself—are we really okay? Because from where I’m standing, we’re spiraling backward at full speed.

Once upon a time, this country was so pressed about not being ruled by a king that they literally fought a war over it. Signed documents, set off fireworks, and made the Fourth of July a whole holiday to celebrate independence from monarchy. And now? Now folks are out here practically begging to appoint one. The irony is suffocating.

And let’s talk about the choice. Out of all the people in the world to put on a throne, y’all picked this one? Not a wise scholar, not a leader with integrity, not someone actually capable—no, no. Just pure chaos wrapped in a suit.

Meanwhile, other countries are making moves, advancing, looking toward the future. And we? We’re out here running a history lesson in reverse. The same folks screaming about freedom are the first in line to hand it over.

But go ahead, tell me again how we’re the greatest nation in the world. Because at this point, I’m just here for the comedy.

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